by Gabriele Bonafede
As we approach the fifth anniversary of the Brexit referendum, we can anticipate fantastic celebrations. Brexiteers can be happier than British fish about the successful implementation of a project for the epoch. Reality is much better than expected, as the UK is going through a historical crisis threatening its very existence.
After five years from that memorable date – June 23rd 2016 – UK’s fishing and food industries are already ruined. Exports have plummeted. Food prices are soaring in supermarkets and food shortages are looming.
There is widespread desperation growing by the day among farmers, SMEs, fishermen, hauling industry, entertainment and tourism industries, restaurant owners and more. Crops are rotting in fields thanks to a shortage of immigrants who would normally come to pick crops. The haulage industry is in tatters, as it cannot hire drivers. Restaurants cannot find workers. Hospitals cannot find nurses and doctors. Supply chains are being disrupted.
Brexit: no benefits, but countless achievements
Soon the supply chain of UK’s economy will have to face further disruption as imports from the EU will have to be checked as well. The UK financial service industry is declining at a fast rate, with the City losing market positions by the day. Billions of pounds are fleeing the UK, and are being replaced by questionable government expenditure.
A trade deal with Australia is threatening the very existence of British farming and bringing food standards of meat to the lowest levels ever for British consumers.
Brexit is a success story even from the institutional point of view, as the UK is close to losing member nations. Scotland is thinking of leaving the Union for good. Northern Ireland is technically out of the UK’s free trade system from January 1st 2021. Wales is considering independence too.
With Brexit, the UK is on the brink of self-destruction after just six months of the wonderful “leaving Europe” project. These are the most successful achievements ever imagined by Brexiteers.
And there is more. Britons have had their right of free travel restricted to the space of the British Isles. Across the EU they are treated as extra-EU citizens.
Indeed, Brits self-limited their capacity to have holidays and working trips through an entire continent spanning from the Atlantic to the Black Sea. This is a remarkable achievement often forgotten by the Brexit-celebrating press.
Leave the Earth for Jupiter
To celebrate these wonderful achievements, Brexiteers might now choose to go for a similar and yet more dream-laden project. Why only leave Europe? Why not propose a new referendum to leave the Earth altogether?
This project is both extremely interesting and convincing, as long as a new and convenient position for the UK is considered. Within the solar system, the best strategic option is clearly to leave the Earth for Jupiter.
The planet is well placed right in the middle among known planets. This can bring many opportunities for trade deals with Saturn and Uranus from one side and with Mars, the Moon and Venus on the other side thereby bypassing the constraints of an undemocratic Earth run by unelected bureaucrats.
By leaving the Earth, the UK can save at least 300 million pounds a week which can be invested in space-NHS instead. But, above all, the UK can have its independence from a planet where you have to consider the natural equilibrium which allows for breathing clean air. In Jupiter there is no air and the problem would be solved at once.
In addition, leaving the Earth for Jupiter will boost the UK’s economy via huge investments in transport infrastructure, housing, energy plants and so on.
The draft plan to provide workable infrastructure on Jupiter, including highways and golfing resorts, would entail something like 12.3 trillion of trillions of trillions of trillions of trillions of pounds in just five years. This would provide a tremendous number of jobs for all Brits.
Leave the Earth for Jupiter: taking back control
Furthermore, no immigrants would ever dare to cross UK borders now placed on Jupiter. This would result in the UK taking back control of its own borders – currently too close to EU to be fully checked.
No small boats full of hideous immigrants will appear on UK shores. And, by the way, probably there are not even shores in Jupiter, resulting in big savings for the Home Office.
Leaving the Earth for Jupiter means taking back control of UK’s border on a universal dimension never seen before. The Home Office is set have a complete control on every single immigrant from any place of Earth by stopping every attempt to steal jobs from true Brits.
The Union Jack can therefore be placed on top of Jupiter with no challenge to UK’s independence and freedom about its own sacred destiny.
No project fear is the key for a challenging task
Leaving the Earth for Jupiter is really a universal space-global UK project. But of course, there might be Project Fear as, admittedly, this is a challenging task. Leaving the Earth will require stubborn belief in the project and avoidance of internal enemies.
Every UK citizen should keep his/her Union Jack flag at hand as a testimonial of their true Britishness. No non-Union Flag holding person should be allowed to vote for this referendum which, by the way, is strictly consultative. The next government will then apply the results of the referendum without doubt or hesitation.
Of course, triggering the article of an unfair natural treaty between the UK and the Earth will allow for a transition period which will permit our terrestrial friends to sign a trade deal with Jupiter-UK. That is, provided that the new free trade agreement will be signed in fair terms, ensuring a level playing field from the beginning.
As a benchmark, it would be fine to get the same treaty existing between the Earth and the Moon. Should terrestrial friends refuse to allow for a treaty similar to that between the Earth and the Moon, the UK should start threatening a No-Deal to leave the Earth for Jupiter.
The benefits of leaving Earth for Jupiter are huge and depend solely on the will of the British people. Let’s go for it!
It is the best way to celebrate Brexit and the desired global Britain intended exactly five years ago.
On cover, photo by NASA on Unsplash (modified). Original photo here.
